To UMI, With Lots of Love

Yesterday, after finished talking on the phone with my mum, I felt the urge to cry and well... cry I did.

I guess I have not been a good daughter for quite a while. So many things happened and somehow it affected my relationship with my mum. It is not like what it used to be before. And the sad part is.. I have not done much to rectify it.

Even though she has never said it directly to me, I know my mum wishes that my life could be better. I can sense it from the tone of her voice and from the look in her eyes.

Someone said to me that a mother's love has no boundaries and no conditions. I agree with that. My mum never failed me.. not even once. She was always there whenever I needed her... regardless for whatever reason.

But then, it is sad to say that I am not able to do the same thing to her. I cannot match whatever she did to me.... not even close. I know I broke her heart countless times. I know she had, on many occasions, cried because of me. And I know she used to worry, and still worry about me.

Umi, maybe I am not very good in showing it but the fact is, I love you very much. I wish things are different and I wish I know how to communicate with you better. I have been keeping so many things to myself for so long that now I don't know where to start.

I know I have not been a very good daughter and I have hurt your feelings so many times but trust me, they were unintentional. If I could, hurting your feelings would be the last thing on earth that I would do.

Umi, there's no word in this world that can describe how much I love you, respect you and proud of you. I may not be able to show it but I know deep down in your heart, you know how much I love you.

Happy Mother's Day Umi.