Wednesday, August 29, 2007


Malaysia is going to be 50 soon and everywhere (well.. almost) people are talking about the meaning of merdeka and patriotism.

I remember not very long ago omebody used to say that I am not very patriotic.

  1. I find it easier to express myself in English compared to Bahasa... especially when I am angry.
  2. As much as I try to support made in Malaysia products, I still prefer tobuy imported ones whenever possible.
  3. I prefer to listen to Mariah Carey, Gwen Steffani, Norah Jones compared to our local artists...except, Sheila Majid, of course.

Well, I was quite hurt at first when I heard that but after reconsidering it, maybe there's some truth in it. I'm not saying that I agree with the statement about not being patriotic, it's just that I couldn't help but say yes to the fact that my level of patriotism can be further improved.

Nevertheless, that doesn't mean that I do not love Malaysia. I do. In fact, I love Malaysia very much and there is no place in this world that I would rather be except Malaysia. Ye lah... only in Malaysia can you get nasi lemak and teh tarik at 2 o'clock in the morning ..... :)

Anyway, talking about merdeka, one thing that I like about the merdeka celebration besides the fireworks is the advertisements on TV (yes, you read it correctly... Advertisements!), especially the one by Petronas. Every year on all occasions celebrated by Malaysians, Petronas never failed to produce great advertisement. They people behind it (especially Yasmin Ahmad) always come up with creative ideas that will have impact on the viewers.

I particularly like the one about a man who is building a boat for his friend, with the message "Can what we build today take us into tomorrow?".

How very true. Sad to say, there are still a lot of Malaysians out there who are still still lazy and try to find short cuts in whatever they do without realizing that at the end of the day, they are the one who is at the losing end. They still rely on the 'subsidy' by the government as though it is their birth right.

Kudos to Yasmin and her team!

Anyway, to all Malaysians, Selamat Hari Merdeka.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Rebuilding Trust

I found this article while browsing on the net (

When infidelity, lies or broken promises invade a marriage, the trust between husband and wife is severely damaged. However, this doesn't mean that the marital relationship can't be saved.
When your spouse has done something to break the trust between two, rebuilding trust in your marriage can be difficult. Here are suggestions on how to on rebuild trust.

Difficulty: Hard

Time Required: Varies

Here's How:

  • Make a decision to love by trying to let go of the past. Stop obsessing about the situation which broke the trust between you and your spouse.
  • Decide to forgive or to be forgiven.
  • If you are the one in your marriage who lied, cheated, etc. show that the errant behavior is gone by changing your behaviors. That means no more secrets, lies, infidelity, etc.
    Together, set specific goals for getting your marriage back on track.
  • Both of you must renew your commitment to your marriage and one another.
  • The wounded spouse must share the pain. The other spouse must acknowledge the hurt caused by the devastating experience of being lied to or cheated on.
  • Listen completely to one another and with your heart, not just your head.
  • Be honest.
  • Avoid using words that can trigger conflict. Use non-blaming 'I' statements and don't say always, must, never, or should.
  • Take responsibility for your own actions and decisions.
  • Be open to seeking counseling to have a better understanding into what caused the trust to be broken.
  • Remind one another that you each deserve open and honest answers to your questions about the affair or betrayal.


  • Recognize that rebuilding trust takes time. It won't happen over night.
  • It's okay to remember the incidents and the betrayal. You may not forget what happened, but the pain will eventually go away.
  • Be aware of your feelings and share your feelings with one another.

What You Need:

  • Time
  • Patience
  • Honesty
  • Commitment to your marriage
  • Love
  • Forgiveness

Note: Well.... as it says, it is not easy. I know so. :(

Friday, August 24, 2007

What's In A Smile

I was engaged on a telephone conversation just now. The caller was asking for some information. I wanted to transfer the call to the person in-charged but since the line was engaged, I entertained the caller myself. At the end of the conversation, he thanked me for the information and complimented on how helpful I had been. He went further by saying 'I can see the smile in your voice'.

Hmmm.. isn't that nice? I make my day by being nice to somebody. And.. it's not difficult at all. I treated the calller the same way as how I want to be treated. To me a smile worth a thousand words.

A smile is one of the greatest gifts you can give somebody. Likewise, it's also one of the greatest gifts to receive. It is something that is understood universally. Somebody used to say that 'a smile is the original form of instant messaging, a smile is ageless and it never goes out of style'.

So, don't you think that life be better if we all smiled more?

It takes nearly three times the number of muscles to frown as it does to smile. Frowning requires forty-three, while smiling asks only seventeen to help out. So, stop working so hard!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Beauty: Inner or Outer?

We often hear people say beauty is skin deep and a person should be judged by her inner beauty. .

Well, ideally, yes.... if we live in a perfect world. But since we know that nothing is perfect in this world, then most of the time, people are judged by what can be seen from the outer layer first.

Somehow, even though we were taught not to judge a book by its cover, many people still tend to do that. I don't blame them. I used to be like that too (when I was much much younger). You see, I grew up reading fairy tales and stories about princesses who are described as beautiful and princes who are charming and handsome. And in all the stories, they live happily ever after.

So I thought, well.. if you are beautiful, then you must be nice and kind hearted too.

I found out much later that it is not always the truth. There are many people who are not blessed with a pretty face but they have heart of an angel. Likewise, some people can be very pretty at the outside but at the same time they can be evil hearted.

But then whether we like it or not, first impression matters and if we happen to have outer beauty, then we pass the first hurdle.

Hmm.. no wonder people are going for plastic surgeries, liposuction, etc.

But really, I wonder why some people can be so shallow and look at the outer layer rather than the inner part, especially when it comes to relationship. A person can be very pretty or handsome but if we cannot have a decent conversation or cannot get along well with him or her, what's the point?

"When there is outer beauty, one’s mind is happy. When there is inner beauty one’s soul is happy. Only when there is a balance between these two can there be harmony at a place or between two hearts"

Wednesday, August 22, 2007


Hmmm.. today I guess I have succumbed myself to the temptations. Why do I say that?

1. I thought of fasting today (alhamdulillah.. lately I find solace and peace when I fast. So, been fasting almost everyday during weekdays)... but then I decided not to.
2. Spotted a pair of shoes that I know I must have. Tried it on and bought it. Well... I have broken my promise not to be an impulse shopper.
3. Extended my lunch break... something that have not done for quite some time. Been quite busy these past few weeks. Luckily nobody really noticed me coming back late to the office with the shopping bag.

Whatever it is, it sure feels good not to go according to plans.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Mars Vs. Venus

I happen to come across this story which I find quite interesting. It depicts the differences between men and women. It may seem a bit extreme but when you really think about it, well... it does make sense.

A lot of times couples break up because of miscommunication. What men think and what women think sometimes can be very different. As Dr. John Gray said, Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.

Here goes....

The Difference Between Men & Women
By Humor Columnist Dave Berry

Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?"

And then there is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence.

She thinks to herself: gee, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.

And Roger is thinking: gosh. Six months?

And Elaine is thinking: but, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward... I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?

And Roger is thinking... so that means it was... let's see... February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means... lemme check the odometer... Whoa! I am way over due for an oil change here!

And Elaine is thinking: he's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed -- even before I sensed it -- that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected.

And Roger is thinking: and I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a darn garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.

And Elaine is thinking: he's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure.

And Roger is thinking: they'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty. That's exactly what they're gonna say, the scumbags.

And Elaine is thinking: maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, school girl romantic fantasy.

And Roger is thinking: warranty? They want a warranty? I'll give them a warranty. I'll take their warranty and stick it right up..."

Roger," Elaine says aloud.

"What?" says Roger, startled.

"Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have... Oh God, I feel so..." (She breaks down, sobbing.)

"What?" says Roger.

"I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs...

"I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse."

"There's no horse?" says Roger.

"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Elaine says.

"No!" says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.

"It's just that... It's that I... I need some time," Elaine says.

There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.

"Yes," he says.

Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.

"Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?" she says.

"What way?" says Roger.

"That way about time," says Elaine.

"Oh," says Roger. "Yes."

Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.

"Thank you, Roger," she says.

"Thank you," says Roger.

Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a re-run of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of.

A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it. (This is also Roger's policy regarding world hunger.)

The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification.

They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.

Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say:

"Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?"

Thursday, August 16, 2007


Had just finished moving my things to my new place (with the help from the facilities guys, of course). As of yesterday, I am officially with my new department.

I am looking forward to my new task with this department. It is more relevant to my experiences and something that I love to do. I know it's not going to be easy as we have to start everything from scratch.. new mission, vision, directions, goals, etc.. but it's something that I think will be worth the effort.

In a way it's like hijrah. Go to a new place and do something new.

Hope things will be ok.

Mind Boggling, Eyes Popping Jigsaw Puzzle

Yes, that is what I would describe the jigsaw puzzle game which was held yesterday.

We were given 750 pieces jigsaw puzzle and one and half hours of time. Each team has 5 members.

When I signed up I was thinking 'how bad can it be, especially when you are not doing it alone'. Well, it was bad. The one we got was a picture of a building and even though we could separate the colors, they were all so confusing... especially when we were under pressure to beat the time. To make things worse, some teams had their own strategy. They had their 'secret weapons' to come and try to disturb us and make us lost our concentration.

The game was really fun... imagine adults behaving like kids...hahahaha.

The results.. were were in the 3rd place... out of 8 teams. Not bad, I would say.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Stress Pictures

These pictures below are used to test the level of stress a person can handle.The slower the pictures move, the better your ability of handling stress.

Alleged criminals see them spinning around madly while seniors and kids see them still.

Check your level of stress...

Hmmmm..... mine spins... faster and faster. Does that mean ....????? out!!

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Memangkecoh: Staff Game

I missed the fist game of our yearly Staff Games. The Congkak competition took place this afternoon and i was too busy to spare time to play/watch/support.

From what I heard it was really kecoh... Sad to say that our team did not win any points. It's ok guys. There are still other games and I'm sure we will be able to catch up.

Signed up for Jigsaw puzzle, scrabble, sudoku and treasure hunt. .... all the mind boggling games..hehehehe. wanted to sign up for bowling but I don't think I have the time to spare as I have to prepare for a big meeting/interview the next day.

Saturday, August 4, 2007

Kids and Their Naivity

It's amazing how simple gestures can touch your heart.

A few days ago I scolded Ellix for being naughty (again). And as usual, when I scolded her, I cried. I guess I cried because if given a choice I won't do it. But I know I have to because If I don't say anything to her when she made the mistake, then she will assume it is ok to do it.

Ellix cried too when she saw me crying. She said sorry but I just kept quite. Then she came to me and hugged me. That was it. The minute she hugged me, all my anger was gone and replaced by love.

Later that night, I had this conversation with her:

"Ellix, why do you hurt mama's feelings?"
"I don't know mama. I'm sorry."
"Promise me that you will not hurt my feelings again"
"I will try mama. But sometimes I can only do it on weekends. Cannot do it everyday. But I promise I will try".

Well.... I cannot help smiling. Ellix will always be Ellix.

Thursday, August 2, 2007

C'est La Vie

I always remind my daughter to be thankful of what she has. But then I guess I forgot to remind myself to do so.

I realize that I often wonder why certain things in life do not go as planned. I often ask why I don't get what I wish for, why my dreams are not fulfilled, why things go they way they are?

I guess that is just facts of life. You get some, you lose some. C'est La Vie. I just have to accept that.

I shouldn't be wondering so much. What good will it do? It will make me more miserable.

I should be thankful to God. Thankful that regardless of what happened to me, I am still alive, in good health, have enough to get me by and I have people who still care about me.

If I look around, there are a lot more people who are less fortunate than me. There are people who has to go through sufferings just to stay alive. There are people who barely have enough to eat. And there are people who never knew the meaning of comfort, etc. etc.

I hope it is not too late for me to do that.