Thursday, December 18, 2008

Fast Forward on Life

Sometimes life is just so screwed up so much so i wish i have a remote control and put it on fast forward mode so that I don't have to go through the sufferings. But then what is life without sufferings :(

There are so any things on my mind now but I am just at lost for words. Can't seem to find the appropriate words, sentences or phrases to describe what I am feeling right now.

Numb? Shock? Angry? Frustrated? Victimised? Despair?

It takes a while for reality to sink in and when it does I hope things will be clearer and I can see life again from a new perspective.

Till the time comes... I pray to God to ease my pain and make it more bearable to go through the days. I know what I am doing and I hope it is the right thing to do no matter how crazy it may seem.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Dedication to My Dear Friends

Lately I have been spending quite a lot of time with old friends, either physically or virtually. I remember a few years back our get together sessions were like 2 or 3 times a year. Now it's getting more and more frequent. It looks like we are meeting almost every week.

Everytime we meet, there are always things to talk about, be it reminiscing the past, updating on the current going-ons or predicting the future. Whatever the topics are, we definitely have fun just to be among friends.

And not forgetting the fact that most of us are practically in front of the computer everyday, reading and replying to the tonnes tonnes of emails that keep coming from the group.

What can I say except that I feel I am so blessed to have such friends. Friends who accept each other the way they are... through thick and thin.

We lost a friend due to cancer last year and in a way, there is a blessing in disguise. Somehow it makes us realize that we have to live the moment. Life is too precious to let it just pass by. We lost a friend but a we regain so many back. As I said to my friends a few days ago, I have a feeling that Arwah Dahlia is smiling down at us now, happy that her friends rekindled the sisterhood bond that was built more than a quarter century ago.

To all my friends (you know who you are) you ladies are simply the best! You make me realize that age is just a matter of numbers. You can always twist them around... :)

Anyway, here is something that I would like to share. Some of you may have come across this article before but then I know some may have not. This is for all the matured ladies out there. Have fun!

Reputedly by Andy Rooney (an American humorist and commentator)

As I grow in age, I value older women more. Here are just a few reasons why:

An older woman will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

If an older woman doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And it's usually something more interesting.

An older woman knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom.

Older women are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

An older woman has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women.

An older woman couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to an older woman. They always know.

An older woman looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older woman is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Count Our Blessings

According to MSN Money, inflation in Asia is out of control and the situation most likely will be getting worse in the coming months. For Malaysia, the 3% annual rate for April was a 15-month high, and Bank Negara is now predicting inflation will climb to 4.2% for all of 2008. *sigh*

But if we think our situation is bad, it looks like our neighbour country, Indonesia, is even worse. There's an article in NST today about Jakarta's urban poor that makes me realize how lucky our children are compared to some other children in other parts of the world.

The article reminds me of what happened during our recent trip to Bandung.

It was around 8pm. My husband wanted to alter the pants that he bought at one of the factory outlets. He asked our taxi driver who was waiting for us outside the shop and before the man could answer, there was this young girl about 8 years old who said "Pak, saya boleh tunjukkan" (Sir, I can show you"). So, my husband followed her.

After about 30 minutes, I saw my husband walking back and just slighly infront of him was the same girl who showed him the way just now. When he arrived at the place where I was waiting for him, I heard the girl kept saying "Terima kasih Pak" (Thank you sir) a few times. Then she left.

My husband was quite for a while during our journey back to the hotel. Then he told me what happened.

According to him, after the girl showed him the way, he gave her Rp2,000 which is equivalent to about 76sen. She was so happy and quickly she went to buy 2 pieces of bread. She ate one and she kept the other one. The way she ate it somehow showed that she was hungry and my husband asked her "lapar ya?" ("hungry?"). She answered "ya Pak. Ngak makan dari pagi" ("yes sir. I have not eaten since morning"). Later she said that the other piece was for her brother.

Anyway, my husband told her that she could go if she wanted to as he knew how to get back to where I was waiting but she continued to wait with my husband until the pants was ready.

My husband kept saying how lucky our daughter is. Imagine those children who have to do all sorts of odd jobs to survive. Rp2,000 which he gave to the girl may not mean much to us but to her it filled up her hungry stomach and maybe her brother's as well. And the Rp2,000 given to her was enough to make her waited for my husband to finish his errand.

This happened before the recent fuel hike. If life was difficult for them before, I'm sure it will be worse now.

We should count our blessings. At least our children are able to enjoy a much better life.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

What I Learned

Exactly 3 years ago, I made a decision which I later regretted. It took a while to rectify things and as expected, nothing was the same anymore. But little did I know that it was actually a blessing in disguise.

I guess if I did not make that decision, life would not be as it is now. Even though I do have my 'down' moments, but on the whole, life is a lot more tolerable. I began to look at things at different perspectives and in a way it makes me become more adaptable. I thank God for that.

Anyway, here is something that I happen to find on the internet which I would like to share.

What I Learned
by: Author Unknown, Source Unknown

I've learned
- that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I've learned
- that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.

I've learned
- that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned
- that it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned
- that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned
- that it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it. I've learned - that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned
- that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned
- that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned
- that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned
- that learning to forgive takes practice.

I've learned - that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned
- that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned
- that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I've learned
- that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many years you've lived.

I've learned - that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed you.

I've learned
- that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned
- that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned
- that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

l've learned
- that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned
- that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions.

I've learned
- that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I've learned
- that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned
- that there are many ways of falling and staying in love.

I've learned
- that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I've learned
- that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned
- that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pains.

I've learned
- that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned
- that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Sexy Uniform?

I'm back.... finally!!

I have been quiet for almost 2 months.. for no specific reasons actually except that I was bitten by the "lazy bugs". :)

I would still be nursing my laziness if not for my utter disgust on the claims made by Ms Munirah Bahari of National Islamic Student Association of Malaysia that the school uniform worn by girls at government schools "encouraged rape and premarital sex" (as reported by The STAR on 22nd May 2008)

How could she make such claim. It is such a senseless allegation. I wonder whether she really knows what she is talking about. What is so sexy or alluring about a white, straight cut baju kurung top?

Again, women, girls are being blamed for the societal problems that we are facing now. How very unfair. What about those guys who are the cause of the problem? I think instead of zooming on the "prospective" victims, why don't our system do something about those who commit the crime? More severe punishment, perhaps?

No doubt women/girls do contribute to the problems to a certain extent. But, to even think that the current uniform don by the government school girls are encouraging rape and premarital sex is just unbelievable. School uniform?? Urghh! What a narrow-minded statement coming from a University student. Pre-marital sex has nothing to do with what the girls wear to school. And as for rape, as we are all very much aware, even those who are clad in tudung and decently covered are not spared either. Those rapists do not zoom their victims to certain group of people. As mentioned by ivy Josiah (WAO), "rape is not about attire, it's about power that perpetrators feel they have over their vistims."

So Munirah, next time do think wisely before you speak. As a University student, you should know the importance of doing proper researches and studies before making such public statements. It shows one's level of thinking.

Monday, March 31, 2008

A Cursed Gift?

Is it a gift or a curse?

A friend gave the URL for News of the World regarding a Maths genius who used to make headlines before (note: some people may find the photos a bit offensive). Sufiah Yusof, who won a place at Oxford University at the age of 13, is now a £130-an-hour HOOKER.

At first I thought it was just one of the e-mail junks that people spread around. How could a brilliant girl, I mean really BRILLIANT girl ended up like that? But then since the news about her is all over the newspapers, I guess it must be true.

This is a reminder to us all. Don't push the children over their limit. They might rebel and do something beyond our imagination. Touch wood.

I still feel so sad for her. I imagine what it would be like to be in her shoes. She must have felt so suffocated that anything is better than being under the watchful eyes of her too domineering father.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008


I did not cast my vote last Saturday as I was not sure who to vote for in PRU12. As much as I wanted to show my support to the government by choosing the BN's candidate, a major part of me decided not to. So, at the end, I felt contented by just accompanying my husband to cast his vote in Subang Jaya.

Along the way to the polling station, we talked about the candidate that he was going to choose. To be honest, we didn't know who the candidates were. All we know was, we wanted some changes.

Little that we know, that was the sentiments of so many other Malaysians too.

Around 2-3am, Sunday, my husband woke me up to tell me that Datuk Seri Shahrizat Jalil and Dato' Seri Samy Vellu lost their seats. I quickly switched on the TV inside the room and for the next 2 hours or so, my eyes were glued on the TV.

Sunday Star sums the results of PRU12 as Political Tsunami.

The results of the recent election shows that the Rakyat are not very happy with the government. The Rakyat have spoken... very clearly. It's a wake up call to the leaders. It's up to them now to remedy the situation.

When I went to the office on Monday, I was informed by our Corporate Communication dept that the company had to stop the full page Congratulations Message to BN which was supposed to be out in major newspapers. Hmmm.. there goes RM58K... what a waste.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Love Is In The Air!

Come February the 14th, flowers, chocolates, gifts and words of love are exchanged between the loved ones all over the world in celebration of Valentine's day.

When I was in my teens, I really looked forward to this day as that is the time when I can send love poems to those whom I held dear to my heart and also those whom I secretly admired... and not forgetting the thrills of getting them too.

However, as I get older, I have somehow outgrown my infatuation towards St. Valentine and I feel that we don't need a person or a day to remind us to be nice to our loved ones. Love is something very precious and it should be celebrated everyday. Why wait for February 14th to show your love?

I once told my husband not to buy me roses on Valentine's day as I realize that the price charged is so unreasonable. How very unromantic of me.. considering that my star sign is Pisces. :)

Anyway, as I said before, we don't need February the 14th to show our love. Make it a point to say "I love you" to those people who mean so much to us as often as we can. Let them know that we care about them and we love them before it's too late. I learned my lesson well when my father passed away. I just hope that deep inside he knew how much I loved him even though I very seldom said it.

"I love you" , said on any day will always sound sweet.

A dazzling diamond bracelet, regardless whether given on Valentine's day, Mother's day or Birthday, is still a dazzling diamond bracelet and will always make a woman's heart melt. :)

As Mother Teresa said "Love: A fruit always in season."

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Down The Memory Lane

I was on Yahoo Messenger with a friend this morning and chatting with her brings back a lot of memories.

This friend of mine is currently doing her PhD at West Virginia University, Morgantown, USA. Not many people know about Morgantown as it is just a small university town in the east coast. But those who follow The US college football will note of its existence as West Virginia University is in the top three of the national ranking (Go Mountaineers!!)

There is this song, sung by John Denver "Almost heaven, West Virginia - Blue ridge mountains Shenandoah river - Life is old there, older than the trees - Younger than the mountains growing like a breeze".

Couldn't agree more. I spent three great years there and trust me when I say that the scenery is so beautiful and splendid especially during fall/autumn... when the leaves change and crimson. It's so picturesque. I remember spending hours at the Arboretum near the coliseum ... sometimes taking a walk down the paths, sometimes reading book while having my daily dose of mountain dew and snickers (hahaha.. my main diet at that time), or sometimes just lazing around, doing nothing.

I learned a lot there. Formally, I got my degree. but informally, I learned a lot about life and living. That is something that I will always treasure.

I remember falling in love for the first time there and I also remember having my heart broken for the first time there too. Even though it happened so long ago, but it is still very clear in my mind. I can still picture myself crying my heart out in my room while listening to Whitney Houston's All At Once.. over and over and over.

I also remember partying at the discos after the semesters ended. Our favorite was the one at the Holiday Inn. Can't remember the name though. The first time I went to the disco, I had to borrow somebody else's ID as those below 21 are considered as under aged. I remember the guy who checked my ID looked at me up and down a few times before letting me go in. Then only I realized that the height stated in the ID was 5 feet while I'm much taller than that. No wonder he was skeptical.

This morning my friend mentioned that it started snowing a couple of weeks back and last week the snow was about one feet high. That reminds me of a time when I was stucked in the snow while climbing up a hill to the PRT station (something like LRT). Instead of taking the stairs, I took the shortcut.. ignoring the fact that it snowed quite heavily the night before. Luckily there were 2 guys who were kind enough to pull me out (at that time I was not as heavy as I am now... hehehehe).

Then there was this incident, also happened during winter. I was on my way to class, around 8am and the road was icy and slippery. Instead of my wearing my normal winter boots, I wore my high heels and my suit that morning as I had presentation to do. I think you can guess what happened. Yup, I slipped and fell. It was so embarrassing. Luckily it was still early in the morning and nobody was around except for one lady. She asked me if I was alright and instead of answering her, I asked whether my hair looked okay. Duh, how vain I was...hahahaha.

Well, those were the days...when life was a lot less complicated than now. All I had to worry was how to look good, academically and physically.

Sometimes I miss morgantown and WVU. I just wish that one day I am able to go there again. It would really be nice to be able to visit those places that always have a special place in my heart.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Reunion Dinner

AWESOME!!!!! That is what I can say about the much awaited, recently held reunion dinner for MRSM Kuantan Alumni, best known as KUATAGH, last Saturday (5th Jan 2008).

Once again, our batch recorded the largest number of participants who turned up for the event. There were supposed to be 102 confirmed participants from our batch but on that night a few didn't manage to come and at the end the last count was 94. Not bad at all! 94 out of 600 are from our batch.

I arrived at Sime Darby Convention Centre around 6.30pm with my BFF (gosh! have not used this term for a long long time. Thanks for reminding me, Nini). Good for us as those who came late had to park outside the building.

Eventhough we have left MRSM for quite a while.. it has been yearsssssss ago (more like.. once upon a time...), one thing that never change is once we are among friends, we sort of like transported back to the old days. Screams of excitements can be heard from all corners of the ballroom, particularly ours. There were also a lot of huggings and kissings.

No words can describe the joy of seeing some of the old friends whom I have not met for over 20 years. Some remain more or less like before (much to my envy), some have changed physically (including me), and some look even better than what they used to be (hmmm... I definitely envy them the most!!!).

It was great to get together with friends again. We had fun talking and reminiscing about the old days. Had fun teasing each other about old flames. We even had fun catching some of us in action... :)

Those are the people whom I grew up with. Had been with them during my adolescence years.. we used to share not just foodstuffs and things.. but it goes beyond that. We shared our laughs, our sorrows and our dreams together.

The reunion did not stop there. Around 30 of us proceeded to a mamak restaurant in Taman Tun after that for teh tarik and roti canai... and of course for more laughters and catching ups, which lasted until 3am. It's amazing to see that as we mature, we appreciate friends, especially old friends, even more.

To all my friends.. you guys are GREAT! AWESOME!